(一) Self Worth 的诞生 Self worth只有在被threaten之后,才会成为一个概念。比如,因为各种原因,被攻击、被歧视、被否定。小小朋友是没有这个概念的。 Self worth是Ego层面的概念,它不是一个真正存在的东西,所以很难positively affirm。 (二)寻找Self Worth 即使想要positively affirm self worth,效用也是非常短暂的,因为它停留在概念层面(conceptual thinking),而不是感知层面(deeper knowing,“明了”)。 概念层面上对self worth的affirmation,也经常只是用「彼处的superiority」来找补「此处的inferiority」:别人说我长得不好看,那我就要学习超好/找个好工作/赚很多钱/“出人头地”,however it is defined。而这些superiority/inferiority,全是概念,全是“故事”。即使做到了,也是“虚相”。对比“实相”,就好比是“How do I make a better story of me” vs “I live”。 (三)为Self Worth而战斗 当然,作为一种保护机制,当我们的Self worth被threaten,第一反应就是找补、代偿,“证明自己”,“爱自己”。这种保护机制也是为我们好。只是,久而久之,我们会陷入一个虚相概念上的斗争。”I was dragged into a battle that I didn’t want to fight. And there was no winning.” (四)放下追寻的Inherent Self Worth,去拥抱Full Aliveness 与其追寻unconditional self love、inherent self worth,不如anchor在 living in full aliveness 。 When was the last time you felt the most alive?如果feeling full aliveness听起来太抽象,那么when was the last time you were in the flow?相信心流的体验大部分人都有过。在心流中,就...